Why This Is
by IluvSurius
Summary: Lily expects life at Hogwarts in her 6th year to be easy going and laid back. Ha,thats a laugh! When at school with James Potter, there's no such thing as laid back...or normal!
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1: Way To Close  
  
(a/n: It gets into Lily/James in a moment)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't *sadly own any of these characters but if I did, ^smiles^, Sirius would be alive, Harry would not have dead parents and I would be dating Harry!  
  
(a/n: Just be glad you don't live in my world) (another a/n: Fluffy eats flames :P ) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Harry Potter sat alone in his; messy room witch matched his messy hair. There was no reason to keep tidy; he wasn't placed on this earth to please anyone. Even if some arrogant relatives believed so. Harry believed he was placed on this earth to protect if anything. But in truth, pleasing someone would be a heck of a lot easier than protecting someone. Because he was placed on earth to protect, there were consequences not worth his duties. So many died at his feet, that he would give up his own life for all of those lost. Sirius was gone, and the fact that he was gone trying to protect Harry. That thought would plague him till his grave. When thinking about Sirius, Harry's mind couldn't help but wonder to his parents. What he wouldn't give just to see their faces or even just to know how they led their lives. He knew his father had been arrogant but he was young. His mother was beautiful, young and extremely smart. It's a wonder they ever fell in love or had him for that matter. What he wouldn't give for a glimpse of the past...Harry suddenly felt wary. He needed sleep. His mind had been going ninety to nothing ever since his beloved god fathers death. Harry placed his glasses on the nightstand and fell into a long slumber.  
  
(a/n: Now it goes L/J...there on the Hogwarts Express)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"James Potter, what am I going to do with you" sighed young, Lily Evans as she passed through the Marauder's compartment.  
  
She was on her way to her own compartment when James had to stop, look her up and down, then whistle. All the Marauder's laughed hysterically and James raised hie eyebrow. Loving all the attention from his friends and admirer's.  
  
"You think this is SO funny, do you" she snapped at the Marauder's.  
  
They nodded their heads but eventually stopped laughing.  
  
"You know what you can do Evan's," asked James as he gazed at the compartment full of on lookers?  
  
"Let me guess..."  
  
"Go out with me, this Saturday" he stated.  
  
"Never in a million years Potter, A MILLION years."  
  
Lily was laughed out of the compartment but when she turned around, James looked hurt. He wasn't truly hurt, You could tell by the gleam in his eye. That's the way he looked every time she rejected him. It was a gleam of challenge and James lived for challenge.  
  
"Don't worry Lil's" said Tammy, placing a comforting arm around her shoulders.  
  
One of Lilly's closest friends who constantly surrounded her; "He's just an arrogant pratt."  
  
"Yeah Lilly, don't let it get to you" said Sam.  
  
Sam was another one of Lily's best friends. The funny thing about all of them is, Sam liked Remus, and Tammy totally adored Sirius. Lily thought the guy's knew but just didn't want to cross that line. James encouraged a relationship between his friends and her own, probably, because he hoped it would get him closer to Lily.  
  
"You guy's are right" she sighed.  
  
All three of the girl's slid into a comfy seat in their compartment.  
  
"Maybe, he does this just to get me to think about him or talk about him."  
  
"It's obviously working then, huh?"  
  
"You're telling me! It just makes me wonder, why this year?"  
  
"You have got to be pulling my leg"; said Tammy exasperated.  
  
"What made me so special this year for him to whistle like he was home- sick," ask Lily innocently.  
  
"Well, to start with, your B's went to Double D's..."  
  
"That is NONE of his business" pointed out Lily with a playful shove at Tammy.  
  
"When your James Potter, everything is your business" replied Sam.  
  
"Anyway," continued Tammy, "It couldn't possibly be your long, dark red hair, your tantalizingly green almond shaped eyes, you slender figure, the way you style you hair, that perfume you wear that drives him nuts..."  
  
"I get your stupid point", sighed Lily.  
  
"Think of it this way", said Sam, "Its not like you will end up marrying him or having kids!"  
  
Lily laughed. "Heavens NO!"  
  
"But I can't go looking like a slob to keep his hands off me" she complained.  
  
Totally forgetting Sam's little comment.  
  
"You could stop wearing mini-skirts and crop-tops and bedding over." Tammy giggled.  
  
"Maybe, all you need, is some arrogance repellant"; said Serveous Snape as he stalked into the girls compartment.  
  
"Ewe, gross" Lily heard Tammy whisper under her breath.  
  
Of course, she was looking at his unruly, greasy hair.  
  
"What can we for you Serveous" Lily asked politely?  
  
"Oh, yes, what can we do for you, Snivlious" laughed James as he entered the same compartment as the three girls and Snape.  
  
"Honestly Lily, you are way to nice sometimes", said James.  
  
"And maybe you aren't nice enough."  
  
"Potter, I would like to talk to Evan's" said Snape, rather annoyed.  
  
"I'm listening," said James cockily.  
  
"Alone" spat Snape.  
  
"Are you nuts? How dumb do you think I am?"  
  
Lily heard Snape mumble something under his breath.  
  
"Potter, please" said Lily; pushing James away.  
  
"I can't keep you of all people in a compartment, alone, with my girlfriend" he said.  
  
James carefully placed his arm around Lily's waist.  
  
"She's NOT your girlfriend Potter", yelled Snape.  
  
He brought his wand from pocket and pointed it at James.  
  
"James, what have you done" sighed Sirius.  
  
Padfoot, Moony and Wormtail all peeked in on James from there compartment door, witch was a 2 inches open. Tammy and Sam squealed and jumped out of the way. Now they stood behind the 3 Marauder's and watched.  
  
"NO" Lily cried, throwing her arms around James waist.  
  
James looked to the doorway were his friends stood. They all winked at him.  
  
"No, I won't let you hurt James" she repeated.  
  
"Were on first-name speaking terms? This day couldn't get better!" cried James in disbelief.  
  
"He best watch his tongue" said Moony, shaking his head, "If we know Lily Evans and we all do, her temper will rise..." warned Remus.  
  
Lily took her arms off James. What was she doing? Just a moment ago, she had been talking to her friends how much she hated him and now she's throwing her arms around him like he's her boyfriend. What was going on?  
  
"Move away nice and slow Lily so I can fire a spell at Potter here", said Snape.  
  
He kept his wand pointed at James, "Move Ms. Evans. You're so beautiful, it would be a waist to destroy something so lovely."  
  
James burst out laughing. "YOU like Lily? Ha, that's a laugh!"  
  
"We'll see who has the last laugh when I'm done with you."  
  
"Take your best shot"; said James cockily.  
  
"I'm not going to fire at Lily! Now move you stupid girl!"  
  
"Awe hell, he shouldn't have said that" muttered Sirius.  
  
"I sense a temper tantrum," said James.  
  
"You better step back Prongs" piped up Peter.  
  
James did as Peter said just as Lily pulled out her own wand and disarmed Snape.  
  
"Immobilize" she yelled.  
  
Sirius, Remus and Peter through there hands to the ears. This was not going to be good.  
  
"YOU JUST SAID, A MEAR MOMENT AGO THAT I WAS A BEAUTIFUL GIRL AND NOW YOU GO AND SAY, I'M STUPID? HOW DARE YOU, YOU, YOU, BAST-"  
  
"Evan's, calm down," said James.  
  
He walked cautiously over to her. Lily picked up Snape's wand and threw it to him.  
  
"Show me you are more than some idiot!"  
  
Snape picked up his wand and fired a spell at James. Lily jumped in on top of him, just in time. James was knocked over but the spell flew just inches from his face. James didn't care that he was on the ground. In the process of being knocked over, Lily's soft lips had touched his.  
  
James jumped up, toppling Lily over. She crawled over to the Marauders and her friends. In a few short seconds, the duel was over and guess who won? Snape to tell the truth but really, James was the winner. He got a kiss, a hug, and a sign that maybe Lily might have more interest in him than just an enemy.  
  
James wobbled over and Remus performed the counter curses. In great detail did Prong's tell these events, even though they were all there, the Marauder's listened intently as if this was all new to them.  
  
Sirius smiled. "Well you got what you wanted. I just wish I could get Tammy to notice me."  
  
James returned the smile. "She does notice you. Tammy actually likes you."  
  
"And since when were you the female expert" asked Remus a smile playing on his lips.  
  
"Since around 5 minutes ago when my after-shave made Evans give me a hug." He laughed.  
  
They all knew it wasn't the after-shave but they still had no idea what it really was that compelled Lily Evans to protect James Potter.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
They three girls sat back down in their seats in their compartment. Lily couldn't bring herself to look at them. After all that had just happened, could you blame her?  
  
"You, you don't have to talk to us," said Sam, finding sudden interest with a piece of gum stuck under the table.  
  
"She's right," said Tammy.  
  
"I don't know how it happened, or why it happened. So don't ask me", said Lily.  
  
In truth, she had no real idea about what happened. All she knew is that it did.  
  
Tammy and Sam exchanged glances.  
  
"I guess I understand," said Sam.  
  
"Me too" sighed Tammy.  
  
Both smirked to each other and looked at Lily.  
  
"You do know you kissed Potter on the way down..."  
  
"EWE! I DID" she shrieked?  
  
They nodded their heads.  
  
"GROSS, GROSS, GROSS" she yelled Lily made a face at her friends.  
  
The kind, plump woman with the snack cart passed by.  
  
"Excuse me maim" said Lily, "3 Pumpkin Juices please, and make mine awful strong!" _________________________________________________________________  
  
Yeah! Please review, but be careful, I'm only 13! 


	2. Chapter 2 History Of Magic & What Snape ...

Chapter 2: History Of Magic and What Snape Really Wanted  
  
2 reviews...I feel so loved. Did I make it clear that these characters are in there 7th year right? Well, if I didn't make it clear, I did now! I'm not supposed to be on here so don't rat me out!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Dear god, one more class with Potter and I'm going to kill myself" sighed Lily, throwing her shoulder bag onto her desk in Professor Bins class.  
  
"Lily, don't be so dramatic" said Tammy.  
  
"Wouldn't you be a little dramatic if you had Potter in everyone of your classes, and he was Head Boy, when you were Head Girl?"  
  
"Okay" said Sam testily, "But it's only been three weeks into our 7th year."  
  
Lily placed her hand to her temple and rubbed it. "Already, I have had enough of his little antics."  
  
"Oh", they both said in unison, exchanging glances as James slid into the seat behind Lily.  
  
"How's Mrs. Potter today, hmm"?  
  
"Just fine" said Lily, trying to keep her voice from quavering.  
  
Sirius, Remus and Peter; all sat near James.  
  
"About Saturday night" started James.  
  
"No" she said flatly.  
  
"Someone's testy" replied Sirius with a grin.  
  
"Leave her alone" scolded Tammy.  
  
As soon as she turned around, Sirius stuck out his tongue.  
  
"Grow up," said Sam, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Good afternoon class. I am Professor Bins, your "History Of Magic" teacher. Please copy everything from on the boards" said P. Bins sleepily.  
  
Lily listened to the sound of 42 quills before she started copying notes off the board. She was going at a steady pace before she was forced to stop. James was rubbing his hands on the back of her neck.  
  
"Potter, what are you doing" she hissed.  
  
"History of Magic is boring. You might as well be comfortable in this stupid class." He grinned.  
  
"Potter, get your hands off my shoulders."  
  
"Would you mind terribly if I put my lips on your neck"?  
  
"What do you think?"  
  
"I'm thinking no but hoping for a yes" he replied cockily, continuing to massages her neck.  
  
Lily must admit, it felt good. She had spent many a night, up to her eyebrows in studying and hadn't gotten much sleep. 'Shrug it off' she scolded herself for falling victim to James. Lily shrugged James hands off her neck and shoulder's.  
  
"Well I never" said James sarcastically.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Lily!" shrieked Sam sitting down next to Tammy and Lily.  
  
"What has Potter done, now" asked Lily icily?  
  
"Not Potter, Snape, he wants to talk to you over there." She shuddered.  
  
"Okay" said Lily slowly, getting up and making her way to Snape.  
  
"Where's Evans going?" asked Moony  
  
James head snapped to attention at her name. He followed Remus's gaze to Lily, making her way to Snape.  
  
"That dirty git. He always wants what I have" said James, anger rising.  
  
"That's true. To a certain extent" said Peter.  
  
James gave him a side ways look.  
  
"What Wormtail is trying to say, Prongs, is that Snape is overlooked in your shadow but you don't HAVE Lily yet" said Sirius coolly.  
  
"I'm not giving him the chance."  
  
Sirius grinned. "Don't go doing anything STUPID Prongs."  
  
"Yes Servious" asked Lily?  
  
"I wanted to tell you what I was trying to say in the first place. On the train, before Potter had to come and stick his nose in my business. Sorry for calling you stupid, its actually on the contrarily. It's just that, Potter is so arrogant..."  
  
"You're telling me," said Lily.  
  
"Anyway" continued Snape.  
  
He leaned in and kissed Lily on the lips.  
  
"Oh, dear god" she said, wiping away the kiss frantically with her sleeve.  
  
"What the HELL do you think your doing" yelled James, tackling Snape to the ground.  
  
Lily ran off to the bathroom, a tear escaping the corner of her eye.  
  
"Look what you've done," yelled Snape.  
  
"What I'VE done" screeched James, hitting Snape with a left-hook.  
  
"C'mon" yelled Sirius, motioning to the other Marauder's.  
  
The other three boys ran off to go help beat the crap out of Snape.  
  
"Oh, Lily" whimpered Tammy.  
  
"Poor Lily" said Sam in a 'I'm sorry for you/glad that's not me' tone.  
  
Both girls ran after the wrecked friend.  
  
"McGonagal's (spelling?) gonna have your badge for this one" said Sirius to James. "Who cares, this arse kissed Lily," yelled James. He hit Snape in the mouth.  
  
A teacher pulled a Marauder One by one, to their feet. Professor Wellen's picked off Sirius who was flailing his arms around. Madame Hooch picked off Remus who was kicking like crazy. Professor Shames picked up Peter who failed to struggle. Lucky James was the last one to be plucked from the fight by Professor McGonagal. He thrashed around like crazy, trying to get his hands around Snapes, skinny neck. She grabbed James by the collar, nearly choking him. By now, the whole school was watching, eager to see just how McGonagal was going to skin James hide.  
  
"Follow me, you four" she said sharply, "Especially you Mister Potter. We have Head Boy privileges to discuss."  
  
James gave a pleading look at the girl's bathroom but sighed. "Coming."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
How interesting. Well, I was banned from this fic but I'm on here anyway. Sneaky, sneaky, sneaky me. Anyway, I might be back in a matter of days, or hours. If my parents catch me and you never hear from me again. You know what happened. You will find my arse plastered to a wall somewhere. Thank you for the 2 nice reviews. Even if it's only 2!  
  
~ Emily a.k.a IluvSurius ~ 


	3. Chapter 3 Padfoot Takes The Heat

Chapter 3: Padfoot Takes The Heat  
  
(a/n: Everyone having fun, I hope. I sure am!)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Alright" said McGonagal sharply, "Who swung first?"  
  
James gave his friends the 'Well-It-Was-Nice-Knowing-You' look. He was about to speak up. This was the end. No more being Head Boy or getting a chance with Lily.  
  
"Mr. Potter, I'm sure you understand, that if you did indeed throw the first punch, you will get to miss out on some very important Head Boy opportunity's" said McGonagal, eyeing all four boys.  
  
"I did" said Sirius, getting up, "Put me in chains, throw me to Filch. Just don't take away Prong's badge."  
  
"Very well, Mr. Black, three weeks detention for you. One week for the lot of you. Every evening at mid-night, meet me in the great hall...Understood?"  
  
"Yes maim", they all said in monotone.  
  
"Very good. And for you Mister Potter, be careful. One more mess up like this and that's the end of Head Boy title. You're dismissed."  
  
All four boys pretended to look guilty as they walked out of McGonagal's office. As soon as they were out of earshot, is when James burst with the question.  
  
"What did you do that for, Padfoot? Now you have detention for three weeks."  
  
"We didn't want you to lose your badge Prongs. What about the 7th year dance?" asked Sirius.  
  
"7th year dance? Mustn't have got the memo" said James sarnotailicailly.  
  
"Didn't get the memo? Prongs, surely your pulling our legs," said Remus.  
  
"Nope, never heard of it." James sighed.  
  
"We are having a 7th year dance in three weeks, Prongs. Its Hogwarts tradition for the Head Boy to take the Head Girl." Remus smiled.  
  
James grinned like Remus had given him a million galleons and Lily. "You're NOT kidding, right?"  
  
"Not joking."  
  
"Speaking of Lily" said Peter quietly.  
  
"Lily! Oh yes Lily. Thank you Wormtail!"  
  
James turned around and ran.  
  
"Should we follow him?" asked Sirius.  
  
"Nah, let him go" assured Remus.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Lily, come out of that stall" said Tammy, tapping lightly on the door with her knuckles.  
  
"Never" said Lily with a sob.  
  
"Come on Lil's, its not all that bad?" asked Sam looking at Tammy who nodded her head.  
  
"No, I'm not coming out" spat Lily.  
  
"I didn't want to have to pull this card," said Sam and Tammy shook her head in agreement.  
  
"You know Sam, its been at least three weeks since they cleaned that stall" started Tammy.  
  
"That's not going to work this time, you two," said Lily with another sob.  
  
The bathroom door swung open and James slid in.  
  
"This is a GIRL'S bathroom James! Get out" shrieked Sam.  
  
"I don't care," said James simply.  
  
He composed himself enough to say, "Lily, its okay, I'm here."  
  
"And that's going make her feel better?" said Tammy sarcastically, rolling her eyes.  
  
"James, get out" said Lily in nothing higher than a whisper.  
  
"Not until you talk to me" he replied, his hands, palm-down on the door.  
  
"Not now" she said simply.  
  
Suddenly what McGonagal said came floating into his brain. He ran out the door of the girl's bathroom.  
  
"That git left" said Tammy.  
  
"And in a hurry" commented Sam.  
  
Lily unlocked the bathroom stall and sauntered out. She went over to the mirror to wash off the mascara and apply new. Lily redid all her make-up, not even glancing at her friends.  
  
"You can't ignore us forever", said Tammy.  
  
"I'm not ignoring you" she said pushing them out of the way and walked out of the girl's bathroom and right into James.  
  
"Talk to me Lily" he said, blocking the way.  
  
"There's nothing to talk about. You saw what happened, the whole school did" she said, holding back the tears warning to leak out the side of her eyes.  
  
"Oh, Lily" said James about to pull her into hug, when Lily ducked. Forcing James to hug the air.  
  
"What the?" he said seeing Lily walking towards the common room.  
  
"Let her go Prongs" said Sirius clamping a hand on James shoulder.  
  
"Alright" said James, head hung low.  
  
"I have three weeks to get Lily to fall for me, three hopeless weeks."  
  
"That does not sound like the Prongs I know", said Remus.  
  
"Maybe the Prongs you know wasn't so heart-broken." "We'll help you" offered Sirius, "If Lily isn't yours by the night before the dance, let me die."  
  
James smiled. "Thanks Padfoot."  
  
"Anything for a friend."  
  
"Anything for a friend who wants to snog Lily Evans" said Peter trying to keep a straight face.  
  
All four boys cracked up.  
  
_________________________________________________________________  
  
Sorry it's not very long. It shall get longer, I hope. Once again, I'm being sneaky.  
  
~ Emily a. k. a IluvSurius ~ 


	4. Chapter 4 So Right

Chapter 4: So Right? Not much to say in terms except, enjoy! (a/n: Its one-week later) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "What I have here James" said Sirius, motioning to what he held in his hand, "Is a Muggle magazine. Complete with what to Do's and Don'ts of the love world."  
  
"Were did you get this," asked James flabbergasted.  
  
"A lot of haggling with some Slytherians."  
  
"Is this going to work in enough time to get Lily before the dance?"  
  
Remus grinned. "He's a wizard, not a miracle worker."  
  
James hit him in the back of the head with the magazine.  
  
"You're just doing this so you don't have to kill yourself on the day of the dance" said James.  
  
"Yes and no. You and Lily seem so right for each other but then when you think about it. Its so wrong" said Sirius.  
  
He snatched the magazine back and pointed to a section in the back.  
  
"Just never use these pick-up lines. It shows how many times they have been used and how many times it worked."  
  
"Thanks Padfoot!"  
  
"Anytime Prongs" said Sirius.  
  
James got up from the dinner table.  
  
"He and Lily haven't spoken since Snape kissed her" pointed out Peter.  
  
Remus cracked open a book and propped his feet up.  
  
Sirius grinned. "Good point Wormtail except...Snapes still in the Hospital Wing!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Oh get over yourselves" laughed Lily at her friends.  
  
"Remus and Sirius are never going to notice us" they complained.  
  
"You have NO idea how lucky you are," said Lily flatly.  
  
James walked into the Common Room and plopped onto the couch.  
  
"Were just going to leave you two alone" said Tammy, grabbing Sam's arm and ushering her out of the room.  
  
"Lily-"  
  
"Don't talk to me Potter. I'm trying to study," She said icily.  
  
"What a cawinkie-dink" he said sarcastically.  
  
Lily grinned. "You, James Henry Potter, cracking a book?"  
  
"Not a book per say."  
  
"What is it then?"  
  
"Wouldn't you like to know" he said cockily.  
  
"Fine be that way," she said jokingly.  
  
'What is going on? Why isn't she yelling? Maybe its just me but...is she flirting?' James thought to himself.  
  
He tuned out Lily and got down to reading.  
  
::How To Start a Conversation::  
  
1. Start with a joke.  
  
A good one. It's a great icebreaker, and if it's genuinely funny (though not dirty), you've got a good chance. If you get a laugh, go on to introduce yourself. If you don't, get out — fast. 2. Make eye contact Yes, most women like attention, but they don't necessarily want you to gawk or ogle to get it. Instead, show her that you're genuinely interested and sincere when you tell her she "has incredible eyes." 3. Ask her advice  
  
Solicit her opinion on something like what you should get your sister for her birthday (shows you think she has good taste) or if she knows how the so–and–so Supreme Court case turned out that day (shows you think she looks intelligent). 4. Open up online  
  
The next time you introduce yourself on Match.com, do it with a little flair. Start with a romantic or funny story or create a riddle with an answer that reveals something about yourself. 5. Act innocent  
  
If you want to introduce yourself without appearing overly suggestive, that's exactly what you should say. "I'm really not trying to pick you up; I just wanted to know if you've ever been to such and such, because I know I've seen you there before, and I didn't want you to think I was rude by not acknowledging you." 6. Ask for the introduction  
  
If you're feeling extra confident and thick–skinned, simply ask, "Would you like to meet me?" 7. Be charming Some one–liners can be effective — and irresistible — if done right. Try one of these (with a playful and confident approach): "If he doesn't show, I'll be right over here" or "There you are! I've been looking all over for you." 8. Be brave  
  
Subtlety has its place, but sometimes it's best to just go for it. After sizing up the situation and how much time you have to work with, you may just want to come right out and say, "I'm really attracted to you and would like to spend some time with you." 9. Walk by, nod or wink and keep going  
  
If she's interested, she'll follow and introduce herself. 10. A novel idea  
  
Try this opener: "Hi, my name is?"  
  
::Some Guy/Girl Turnoff's::  
  
1. The unwashed look  
  
Lank, greasy, uncombed hair; stains on the clothing; green stuff in the teeth — a grunge fashion statement or just lousy hygiene? You may not want to hang around long enough to find out! 2. Roving eyes  
  
Dudes who ogle their dates' dimensions (and worse, other women's too) and never look above the neck don't deserve second dates. 3. Prejudice  
  
She leans in close, glances around quickly to see who's listening and says something that reflects prejudice and ignorance. Where do people get the nerve? Maybe they don't realize you know anyone who is gay, disabled, or of a different ethnic or religious background — or any other characteristic that makes us unique. 4. Free–loadin'  
  
Never assume that someone else will pay your way. If your date takes it for granted that you're footing the bill, or tries to take advantage of your generosity, it's time to think again. 5. Cluelessness  
  
If a guy invites you to his house for dinner, you should be able to find your way to the bathroom without wading through pizza boxes and last month's laundry. And when you get to the bathroom, the toilet seat should be down. 6. Machismo  
  
If your date starts making all the decisions without first consulting you — from deciding where to go to ordering your meal to dictating the music — tell him to take his macho ape act elsewhere. 7. Complete disregard  
  
If you run into a group of your date's friends and you don't get introduced, consider this date the last. 8. Lack of control  
  
There's nothing more fun than taking care of someone who's had too much to drink, is there? Cut the apron strings, call a cab and say bye–bye. 9. Couch potatoes  
  
Don't settle for someone who's more comfortable dating on the couch than being seen with you in public. 10. Cell phones  
  
When your date spends more time talking on the phone than talking to you, end the date with a polite, "Don't call me; I'll call you."  
  
::How Badly Do You Want To Turn Her Off? Some Very Bad Pick-Up Lines::  
  
|Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see! |3|0| |Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock! |3|0| |Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself |5|0| |in them. | | | |Do you have a boyfriend? [No] Want one? [Yes] Well, when you want a |4|0| |MANfriend, come and talk to me. | | | |Do you want to see something swell? |4|0| |Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose. What? (Reach up and |7|0| |gently squeeze her nose) BEEP! | | | |Excuse me, I'm a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a|6|0| |cab home together? | | | |Hey babe, wanna make an easy fifty bucks? |2|0| |Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you. |4|0| |I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced |2|0| |nipples. | | | |I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk. |2|0| |I'd marry your cat just to get in the family. |5|0| |I've gotta thirst, baby, and you smell like my Gatorade. |1|0| |My friend and I have a bet that you won't take off you blouse in a |2|0| |public place. | | | |No, I'm not a cop. What can I get for fifty bucks? |2|0| |Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow |6|0| |yours? | | | |Pardon me, are you in heat?! |2|0| |Should I call you in the morning or nudge you? |5|0| |So, you're a girl huh? |6|1| |Stand back, I'm a doctor. You go get an ambulance, I'll loosen her |1|0| |clothes. | | | |Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it|2|0| |ain't floppy. | | | |Would you like to come over to my place later? You can bring some |2|0| |friends because my face seats five. | | | |You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case. |1|0| |You make my software turn to hardware! |1|0| |You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear. |2|0|  
  
|Submitted Line |Attempts |Success| | | |es | |To a girl with braces, and if you have them as well: |--- |--- | |"Hey, wanna hook up sometime?" | | | |If you were a booger I'd pick you first. |not |0 | | |enough | | |Pardon me, have you seen my missing Nobel Prize |--- |--- | |around here anywhere? | | | |Are you accepting applications for your fan club? |--- |--- | |Hey baby... drop that zero and get with the hero in |10 |10 | |other words... you better come with me. | | | |Hey baby you're so fine you make me stutter, |--- |--- | |wha-wha-what's your name? | | | |My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me any time |--- |--- | |you want to | | | |Hi... would you f*** me? I'd f*** me, I'd f*** me |--- |--- | |real hard!! | | | |Is your name Pepsi cause' I've gotta have it. |--- |--- | |There's this movie I wanted to see and my mom said I |--- |--- | |couldn't go by myself..... | | | |Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you |--- |--- | |checking out my package. | | | |When I first saw you, I knew we could win the Stanley|--- |--- | |Cup in tonsil hockey. | | | |Want to taste my d***? (What!?!) I said, "do you want|--- |--- | |to taste my drink?" | | | |They call me "coffee". I grind so fine. |--- |--- | |Can I stir your drink? Mind if I use my d***? |--- |--- | |Which one of the Spice girls are you? |54 |2 | |Male: Hey, I don't feel to good. Female: Why? Male: I|1 |0 | |feel like I have an elephant in my stomach. Female: | | | |What? Male: (looking down) I think his truck is | | | |already sticking out. | | | |Weren't you at the tractor pull last night? I |--- |--- | |remember your t*ts. | | | |Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards |--- |--- | |with a little bit of you wrapped up in it. | | | |(Used while you and a male friend wear a bib. Walk up|--- |0 | |and stare at breasts) Mama! | | | |This is a test of the emergency pick up line service.|Instead, |0 | |Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you|they had | | |would have just heard a bad pick up line. |to hear | | | |that. | | |Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to |--- |0 | |explore Uranus. | | | |Guy: I bet you're a C-cup. Girl: How'd you know that?|--- |0 | |Guy: My testicles are the same size. | | | |My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold |--- |0 | |it in | | | |Did your father have shex with a carrot? Cause you've|--- |0 | |got nice eyes. | | | |I'm bigger and better than the Titanic..... only 200 |--- |0 | |woman went down on the Titanic | | | |Can I take you to the Bone-yard? |--- |0 | |I may not be dairy queen but I'll treat you right!!! |--- |0 | |Tickle your p*ssy with a feather? (What?) I said, |--- |0 | |"Particularly nice weather." | | | |My love for you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in.|--- |0 | |Did you just sit in a water puddle, or are you just |--- |0 | |happy to see me? | | | |Damn, have you been eating beans and rice lately? |--- |0 | |I have a .357 magnum pointed at your kidney. Wanna go|--- |0 | |get some coffee? | | | |I just shit into my pants. Can I get into yours? |4 |-3 | |Do you like magic? (Yes or No) I want to cast a spell|--- |0 | |on you with my magic meat wand. | | | |For what sort of person are you looking? Wait- don't |15 |5 | |tell me: medium height, blue eyes, etc... | | | |Roses are red, violets are blue, I have warts, so |--- |0 | |will you. | | | |Don't worry about the missing teeth. It just means |--- |0 | |that there is more room for your tongue. | | | | |--- |0 | |I can see you. [Uh, yeah.] Great! Then how about |4 |2!!! | |tomorrow. | | | |Hi, I'm foreign. I've got Russian hands and Roman |Get it? |Haa | |fingers. |Rushing |haa | | |and | | | |Roaming? | | |Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body |? |2 | |Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to | | | |assume the position. | | | | |--- |0 | |If you were a chicken, you'd be impeccable. |--- |0 | |Can you help me up? My d*** is too big. |--- |0 | |Can I borrow 70 cents? (No) Then how about 69. I'm |--- |0 | |sure you can offer 69. | | | |Excuse me, but do you have tickets? (Tickets for |--- |0 | |what?) (Points to arm and flex) To the gun show! | | | | |--- |0 | |Beww BEWWW Beww (What?) That is the sound of the |--- |0 | |ambulance coming to pick me up because when I saw you| | | |my heart stopped! | | | |Good day for weather. |--- |0 | |You know what you and corn have in common? (No) |--- |0 | |Absolutely nothing! (laugh hysterically at yourself.)| | | |I wet my pants... can I get in yours? |--- |0 | | |--- |0 | | |--- |0 | |You must be this beautiful (make hand gesture for |--- |0 | |small height) to ride the me. | | | | |15 |12 (I | | | |believe| | | |this | | | |guy) | | |--- |0 | |You know, when you and I get old and your |--- |0 | |son/daughter comes up to me and says "Daddy, how did | | | |you meet mommy?" I'm gonna have to tell him/her how | | | |quiet you were, or how difficult you were being." | | | | |--- |0 | |Drive around like a car and make screeching sounds |--- |0 | |and say "Uh, sorry, my uh, breaks aren't working | | | |well. Where are you headed?" | | | |Excuse me. Do you have chicken in your fridge? (yes) |--- |0 | |How big are your breasts? | | | |It's not my fault I fell in love. You are the one |--- |0 | |that tripped me. | | | |Um, you have really beautiful.....uh....eyes, yea. |--- |0 | |You are pretty. What I mean is... You have a nice | | | |forehead. (Messing Up) Do you believe in when I walk | | | |by..... (To yourself) Oh Man, shit, STUPID STUPID | | | |STUPID! | | | | |--- |0 | | |--- |0 | | |--- |0 | |You must be an adverb, because you sure do modify me!|--- |0 | |Excuse me. Do you put on a foundation before you put |--- |0 | |on a powder? (Yeah.) Can I have your phone number? | | | | |--- |0 | | |--- |0 | |Hi, I have my own place... well, my own room... in my|--- |0 | |parents basement... | | | | |--- |0 | |Did you invite all of these people? I thought it was |--- |0 | |just going to be the two of us. | | | |Your graphics are so beautiful that they rival Doom |--- |0 | |3. | | | | |1 |1 | | |--- |0 | |My name is Justin. Justincredible. |--- |0 |  
  
James burst out laughing at the awful pick-up lines.  
  
Lily looked at him like he was crazy. As soon as James was able to compose himself they started talking again.  
  
"James you were so quiet. What is so darn funny? What are you reading?" said Lily, full to burst with questions.  
  
"These are some bad pick-up lines from a Muggle magazine. Sit down and I'll read you one" he said wiping the funny tears from the side of his eyes.  
  
Lily sat back down at the desk she was sitting at and looked at James.  
  
He had to suppress his laughter as he read aloud." Excuse me. Do you have chicken in your fridge? (yes) How big are your breasts?"  
  
"James that's horrible" yelled Lily. Laughing a little too. She wadded up some paper and through it at James witch made him laugh even harder.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"They are so right for each other" mumbled Sirius to himself. "So right." _______________________________________________________________________I didn't make those up! I swear! Can someone explain the HTML on this site? It's confusing! I got all this stuff on a Romance site. I went on the site just to find this stuff! Hehe...It gets VERY romantic soon. Your gonna laugh/giggle all through.  
  
~ Emily a. k. a IluvSurius ~ 


	5. Chapter 5 Plan D and Truth or Dare

Chapter 5: Plan D and Truth or Dare  
  
(a/n: What a creative title! This fanfic will go by fast but will eventually slow down. I hope not to disappoint but with school tomorrow...)  
  
James had tried various methods to get Lily Evans. He still had the strange feeling she was flirting with him. But she couldn't be! This is Lily Evans for god sakes! She didn't want him but Sirius said she did. What did Sirius know? He doesn't have a girlfriend either. Of course, he could have a girlfriend if he wanted anyone else then Lily. But he didn't. Of course, a week had passed since the day she last flirted with him. He had exactly seven days to get Lily Evans to fall for him. Actually, it's six days.  
  
A hand clamping down hard on his shoulder soon interrupted James thoughts. He looked up at Sirius.  
  
"Any affective method" he asked curiously. A huge grin cracked his face.  
  
"No. What makes you so happy, anyway?"  
  
"I have girlfriend," said Sirius trying to burst out laughing, "Me and Remus."  
  
"Great for you...I guess" said James solemnly.  
  
"Aren't you curious as to see who I'm talking about" asked Sirius?  
  
"I'll lie and say I am."  
  
"Com here Hun" said Sirius, now having a VERY hard time trying to control himself.  
  
Tammy came from the girl's dorms and sat on Sirius's lap.  
  
"You have got to be kidding me!" said James, looking bewildered at the happy couple that was Sirius and Tammy.  
  
They started to make-out, right in front of him.  
  
"Let me guess" said James with a tint of bitterness in his voice; "Sam and Remus are upstairs snoging each-other too?"  
  
Sirius shook his head but didn't take his mouth from Tammy's.  
  
"Where's Lily?" Tammy took her mouth from Sirius's just long enough to speak.  
  
"On a date with Amos Diggory. She should be back a half-hour. She was upset about a letter from her sister. Calling her a slut. I think she and Amos are an item."  
  
"Could this day get any better" spat James, "And for god sakes, get a room!"  
  
James got up and stormed out of the common room.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ About a half an hour later ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Lily should be back soon, if you care" said Tammy, with her head laid on Sirius's chest.  
  
"I don't care", said James. He grinned like a madman at Sirius who winked.  
  
Sirius had a plan D. Since plans A-C had sucked.  
  
Sirius suggested making Lily jealous. By using her rich-rival; Hannah. She was second prettiest girl in the whole school and hated Lily.  
  
"I thought you liked her," said Tammy.  
  
"I thought I did too at least, until Hannah and I made out in the library" said James. He grinned at Tammy's reaction.  
  
"I thought you at least wanted to be friends with Lily. And this is just the way to ruin what you have worked so hard to build."  
  
"Hello everyone!" said Lily walking in with a gleam in her eye.  
  
"How was the date Evans" said James like he didn't care.  
  
"Fine as all the same to you Potter," she said dreamily.  
  
Remus walked down the stairs from the boy's dorms with his collar flipped up, grinning. "Who here might fancy a game of truth or dare?"  
  
"I" said everyone in the room.  
  
"Wait," said James glancing at Sirius and then at Lily, "I better go get me date." "Date, hmm" said Lily, brow raised.  
  
James grinned.  
  
Lily looked at everyone in the room who shrugged.  
  
James walked in. Grinning of course with Hannah on toe.  
  
"James Henry Potter...You DIDN'T!" shrieked Lily, look at Hannah like she was a disease or something contaminated.  
  
"Oh, but I did," he said cockily.  
  
Everyone sat in a circle. Lily glared at Hannah who smirked and started biting on James lower lip. Lily shook her fist. James glanced at Sirius who gave him the thumbs-up.  
  
"Alright, I'll start," said Sirius, glancing around the circle for his first victim. His gaze landed at Lily who's face looked horrified.  
  
"Evans" said Sirius, "Truth or Dare"?  
  
"Truth" she said bravely still glaring at Hannah.  
  
"Well, Lily Evans" said Sirius, slyly; "I've been dying to know, where does your heart lie? With James or with Amos?"  
  
Lily bit her lower lip in thought. Neither really. Amos was okay and right now, Lily hated James more than Hannah. He brought her into this on purpose.  
  
"You know what Sirius? Amos is okay..."  
  
James heart nearly stopped. If Amos was okay then he must be...  
  
"But James is by far the biggest, arrogant, jerk, big-headed loser, arse, I have ever had the misfortune to meet!" she yelled.  
  
Sirius winced. On to Plan E? To tell the truth, he didn't have a plan E.  
  
"Well, you know what, LILY?" thundered James; "I hate you even more! You play with me like a toy! Love me, hate me, love me, hate me! And you know what? I'm so sick of it, I don't care if we never talk again!"  
  
"FINE!"  
  
"FINE!"  
  
One door slammed, and then another.  
  
"It was nice knowing you Sirius," said Remus, placing his elbow on his Sirius's shoulder.  
  
"I guess James was right when he said it was hopeless" said Sirius glumly.  
  
"I just wanted to make him happy."  
  
"We all wanted to make them happy" said Sam.  
  
"Come the night before the dance, you're a goner", said Tammy.  
  
"There's nothing left, I have no more plans or tricks. I'm a failure. Not just as myself, but as a friend" muttered Sirius into his hands, "I-I have to go."  
  
Sirius got up and left the room.  
  
"James didn't have to pick Hannah of all people did he" asked Sam looking at Remus.  
  
Remus shook his head solemnly. "I better go find Sirius before he does something stupid."  
  
Moony left leaving the two girls to sit in the common room alone, chewing on the scene that unfolded itself before them.  
  
_________________________________________________________________  
  
Next chapter should be really short and then the next one is ROMANTIC!  
  
~ Emily a. k. a IluvSurius ~ 


	6. Chapter 6 Can't Deny

Chapter 6: Can't Deny  
  
Well, here goes! I'm a little afraid that people are not enjoying this fic but whatever! There lose. Next chapter will be long and for those of you weak at the heart when it comes to love. Look away. Don't go flameing my romance scene here guys! Its fun and I like it. Did I forget to mention that this chapter will have a song that I do not own? *Someone yells from back* "Song STEALER!" I yell back, "Freak in the back row!" This continues...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
(a/n: This song is Sheryl Crow "The First Cut Is The Deepest" My favorite song on the whole planet. Now I am going to shut up so you can read)  
  
(a/n: Okay, maybe not. Now when you see the first 3 *'s across the screen, that means the song starts playing. Anymore *'s are just scene switches. You know, like in the movies when two people are missing each other but denying it? Well, it's like that. The song is playing even though the two are totally oblivious and to concerned in there own thoughts. Now I will really SHUT UP!  
  
(a/n: My computer is making these weird characters! Help me! How do you undo it?) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Well, Lil's, were heading over to Sally's for a sleepover! Leaving you the whole common room to yourself" said Tammy, struggling to hold her sleeping bag and all the goodies she had under one arm.  
  
"Alright. Have fun" she said glumly.  
  
"Bye Lil's" they said heading for the door.  
  
"Wait, You two! I must confess something to you. I've been thinking for a few days and does James seem a little more mature this year?"  
  
The two girls shook their heads slowly, not very sure were this was all going.  
  
"Does he seem nicer to you?"  
  
The girls shook their heads again.  
  
"Does he seem...sexy?"  
  
They shook their heads in the opposite direction than before.  
  
"Lily, what are you getting at" the said in unison?  
  
Lily blushed furiously and let her hair fall in front of her eyes.  
  
"I-I-I think I love James."  
  
"Ha, very funny Lily" said Tammy cracking a smile. Sam looked shocked.  
  
"I don't think she's kidding Tammy", said Sam.  
  
Tammy and Sam exchanged glances.  
  
"Bye Lil's" they said again, and walked out the door.  
  
"They don't believe me," said Lily looking to the door, "No one will."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James looked up at the ceiling, fighting back all the anger he felt inside. Sirius had left his side; he hadn't seen him for days. The dance was tomorrow night and he would never snag Lily. It was hopeless and so was how long Sirius was going live. He played with his snitch he stole, letting it go to impossible lengths and catching it mid air. James just wished he were dead. He wished he had never listened to Sirius. Hannah was a bitch. She was clingy, over bearing and impossible. James glanced down at Hannah, holding onto his waist and sleeping on his abs. How was he to perform an opening dance with someone who hated him and his guts? You can't, so maybe he should just give up on being Head Boy?  
  
*** 'I would have given you all of my heart, but there's someone, who's torn it apart. And he's taken just all that I had. But if you wanna, try to love again. Baby, I'll try to love again but I know. The first cut is the deepest, baby I know. The first cut is the deepest, When it comes to being lucky, he's cursed, when it comes to loving me, he's worst. I still want you by my side. Just to help me dry the tears that I've cried. And I'm sure gonna give you a try, if you wanna try to love again. Trrrry, Baby, I'll try to love again but I know, oh, The first cut is the deepest, baby I know. The first cut is the deepest, but when it come to being lucky he's cursed, when it comes to loving me, he's worst. I still want you by my side, just to help me dry the tears that I've cried. But I'm sure gonna give you a try, cause if you wanna, try to love again. Baby I'll try to love again but I know, The first cut is the deepest, baby I know, The first cut is the deepest. When it comes to being lucky he's cursed, when it comes to loving me he's worst. The first cut is the deepest, baby I know, The first cut is the deepest. Try to love again.'  
  
***  
  
Lily sat in front of her vanity. Applying make-up the way Muggle girls do. She took the blush and slowly moved it over her left cheek and then here right. *** James let the snitch go and caught it. He fiddled with it, messed up his hair and shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Why could he never win the battle of 'Love and War?' *** Lily stared at herself in the long way mirror and let out a sigh as she starred at her own reflection. "I love James Potter." She glanced around and said it again and again, and again. Lily Evans loved James Henry Potter. There was no beating around the bush anymore. She could not deny her heart any longer. It was like living a lie and she wouldn't and couldn't do that to herself. She took out a piece of parchment and a quill.  
  
JAMES,  
  
MEET ME IN THE GIRL'S DORMS AT 8:30 TONIGHT. WE NEED TO TALK. YOU'RE DEAREST FRIEND,  
  
¤LILY  
  
She tied the message to her owl, Lucy, 's foot and let her fly. *** James laid his head on the couch, watching the fire crackle. The flames danced and licked the wood with a passion.  
  
"James" said Remus, glancing out of the portrait to the boy's dorms. "We'll be waiting for you upstairs. Marauder meeting at 9:00."  
  
James glared at him and Remus shut the portrait.  
  
Lily's owl landed softly on his arm. Disturbing James thoughts and worries. He took the parchment off the owl's leg and read it. James read it over and over and over again. Lily wanted to talk and he wouldn't miss it for the world.  
  
______________________________________________________________ Sorry to leave you there but the next chapter is the "Romantic Chapter". So for those weak at the romantic heart, don't read it and later PRETEND you know what the heck I'm talking about. I have a little out-take for you guys because of the over all dullness of this chapter. :o)  
  
~ Emily a. k. a IluvSurius ~  
  
I'm singing the song along as it plays. A curtain pulls up and Sheryl Crow is playing her guitar and sitting on a stool, singing. **Throws hands in the air and starts running around in circles, jumping and screaming** Me: Ohmigosh, Omigosh, Oh My GOD! Its Sheryl Crow! In person! On my set! James looks up from the couch and Lily comes down the stairs. Both: Who the heck is she? Me: **looks at them like their crazy** You don't who she is? They shake their heads. I on the other hand, continue to run and jump and scream. Sirius pops in. Sirius: Your welcome! I run over and start making out with Sirius. YAY! 


End file.
